Nonlinear Ideas Inc. Anybody-Can-Understand Completely-Serious Site Terms Of Use

SITE TERMS OF USE.  The information and graphics ("Materials") on this site are provided by Nonlinear Ideas Inc ("NLI").  The following terms govern the use of this site for anybody who uses it, including you.  By using the site, you agree that you have read, understood, and agree to be bound by these terms and to comply with the laws and regulations for this site.  If you don't agree to the terms of using this site, do not use it. [The site is ours.  If you use it, you agree to follow our rules.  If you don't want to follow our rules, don't use the site.]

Any claim relating to this site or the usage of this site will be governed by the laws of the State of Texas.  Any dispute arising out of your or related to your use of this site will be brought in Collin Count, Texas. By using the site, you agree to waive all other venues and jurisdictions. [If you sue us, you'll have to do it in Collin County, Texas.  We don't have the spare change for gas money to go much further.  You might consider this before you take us to court.]

NLI reserves the right to make  changes to this site and these terms without notice or consent at any time.  If you use continue to use  the site, you are accepting the new terms.  [We can change the site anytime we want to without telling anybody, sending up smoke signals, calling you on your cell phone, or otherwise alerting the media.  If you use the site after we've made changes, you're bound by the new rules just like the old ones.]

USE RESTRICTIONS.  The Materials contained on this site are protected by copyright laws and  international copyright treaties.  Unless otherwise stated, the materials on this site may not be downloaded, copied, or transferred without the express permission of NLI.  [All the material on this site are owned by NLI, or at least licensed to us and owned by somebody else.  Don't steal it.  If you really want it and you ask us, and we are legally able to, we may give it to you.]

WARRANTIES AND DISCLAIMERS.  NLI intends for the Materials on this site to be accurate.  The Materials may contain errors, both technical and typographical.  NLI may make corrections to the Materials at any time.  [Some things on the site may not be correct.  We can fix this, if we know about it.]

THE MATERIALS ON THIS SITE ARE PROVIDED "AS IS".  NLI MAKES NO REPRESENTATIONS ABOUT THE SUITABILITY OF THE MATERIALS FOR ANY PURPOSE AND DISCLAIM ALL WARRANTIES AND CONDITIONS WITH REGARD TO THESE MATERIALS.  [We won't promise you anything at all about the stuff you find on our site.  Clearly, if it's junk, you won't be happy with us.  Regardless, we promise you nothing.]

LIMITATION OF LIABILITY. 

IN NO EVENT SHALL NLI BE LIABLE FOR ANY SPECIAL, INDIRECT,  INCIDENTAL OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES OR ANY DAMAGES WHATSOEVER, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO, DAMAGES RESULTING FROM LOSS OF USE, DATA OR PROFITS, WHETHER IN AN ACTION OF CONTRACT, NEGLIGENCE OR OTHER TORTIOUS ACTION RESULTING FROM USE OF THIS SITE OR ARISING OUT OF THE USE OR PERFORMANCE OF THE MATERIALS AVAILABLE ON THIS SITE, REGARDLESS OF WHETHER TI OR AN AUTHORIZED NLI REPRESENTATIVE HAS BEEN ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES. [You can't sue us for anything if our products don't work or cause you to lose money.  It takes an awful lot of words to say that, doesn't it.]

Downloadable Software.  Any of the software that is made available for download from this site ("Software") is copyrighted.  Use of the Software is governed by the license agreement which accompanies it ("License Agreement"), if one is provided.  Any copying or dissemination of the Software that is not in accords with the License Agreement is strictly prohibited and may be grounds for legal action.  [Any software that we let you download is copyrighted and (probably) has a license agreement.  You can't sell it as your own no matter what and you can't use it as you wish unless the license agreement says you can.  Oddly enough, if you steal our stuff and try to sell it, we may sue you.  There are probably worse things we'd like to do, but we're generally a civilized and peaceful lot who prefer litgation to live ammo.]